The path to self-control begins with restraint. Restraint has several aspects. First, we should avoid situations that would tempt us to sin.
This requires self-knowledge; since by knowing our weaknesses, we can avoid compromising situations.
Second, we should restrain ourselves from acting on the promptings of anger, arrogance, and other momentary impulses.
Thus Father Moon, knowing that he has a temper, says that he must make a continual effort to restrain himself from exploding in anger because he recognizes the harm it would cause others.
Third, religious teachings of non-violence and meekness, of preferring to be beaten than to harm others, train us in the discipline of restraint.
Fourth, Father Moon teaches of God’s restraint and forbearance in the face of constant insults and aggravations over thousands of years as an inspiring example for us as we strive to be people who restrain ourselves.
Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity for the devil.5 Ephesians 4.26-27
Verily God forgives my people the evil promptings which arise within their hearts as long as they do not speak about them and did not act upon them. Hadith of Muslim (Islam)
If an evil man, on hearing of what is good, comes and creates a disturbance, you should hold your peace. You must not angrily upbraid him; then he who has come to curse you will merely harm himself. Sutra of Forty-two Sections 7 (Buddhism)
A single bangle does not make a sound.6 Igala Proverb (African Traditional Religions)
The anger of man does not work the righteousness of God. James 1.20
Abu Huraira reported God’s Messenger as saying, “The strong man is not the good wrestler; the strong man is only he who controls himself when he is angry.” Hadith of Bukhari and Muslim (Islam)
You have heard that it was said to the men of old, “You shall not kill; and whoever kills shall be liable to judgment.” But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother shall be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother shall be liable to the council, and whoever says, “You fool!” shall be liable to the hell of fire. Matthew 5.21-22
The very first principle of religion laid down by Lord Mahavira is Ahimsa—Non-injury to living beings—which must be observed very scrupulously and thoroughly, and behaving towards all living beings with proper restraint and control. Dashavaikalika Sutra 6.9 (Jainism)
“Your cheeks are like halves of a pomegranate behind your veil” (Song 4.3): The emptiest of you are as well-packed with religious observances as a pomegranate with seeds. For everyone who has the opportunity of committing a sin and escapes it and refrains from doing it, performs a highly religious act. How much more, then, is this true of those “behind your veil,” the modest and self-restrained among you! Canticles Rabbah 4.4.3 (Judaism)
Whenever there is attachment in my mind And whenever there is the desire to be angry, I should not do anything nor say anything, But remain like a piece of wood….Whenever I am eager for praise Or have the desire to blame others; Whenever I have the wish to speak harshly and cause dispute; At such times I should remain like a piece of wood. Whenever I desire material gain, honor or fame; Whenever I seek attendants or a circle of friends, And when in my mind I wish to be served; At these times I should remain like a piece of wood.
Whenever I have the wish to decrease or to stop working for others And the desire to pursue my own welfare alone, If [motivated by such thoughts] a wish to say something occurs, At these times I should remain like a piece of wood. Shantideva, Guide to the Bodhisattva’s Way of Life 5.48-52 (Buddhism)
Teachings of Sun Myung Moon
Whenever you feel troubled, you should just let that feeling go. It is wrong to stand up in public and speak about this and that while you are still affected by bad feelings. (45:269, July 4, 1971)
When a person is powerful and capable, if he restrains himself, he gains the people’s respect. But when people who do not have any power or authority show restraint, they are regarded as weak. I have a fiery temper, yet I restrain myself and endure. That is why people think I am a great man. (October 7, 1979)
Don’t get angry. You who walk the path of believers in God will lose everything if you get angry centered on your own desire. (32:34, June 14, 1970)
I, Reverend Moon, am not originally a good-natured person. That is why I train myself, biting my tongue, controlling myself and saying to myself, “I must go this way!” (320:251, April 16, 2000)
If I were to lose my temper at someone, thinking, “That good-for-nothing!” or if I were to nurse feelings of ill will, “Just wait a few months and we’ll see what happens to you…” in the end that person would be broken into pieces. That is why I bite my tongue and control myself. As a True Parent, I cannot use my mouth to curse others. Even as I hold back my words, Heaven releases me completely from my bitter feelings. When you see this, don’t you think God loves me? (162:205, April 12, 1987)
In history those who strike first always lose. Look at the First and the Second World Wars: the side that struck first lost. In the Third World War also, the side striking first will lose.
This is why even in our individual lives, we should persevere and restrain ourselves, for those who persevere will be blessed. Take the beating and persevere. Endure, and someday you will rise. (7:222, November 13, 1959)
God is worthy of respect, for He has been restraining Himself in silence and with patience while enduring thousands of years of insults and suffering. When you truly realize what God has endured for your sake, you will feel deep in your heart, “Lord, you are truly my Father.”
As God’s sons and daughters, should you not resolve to endure for His sake? It will take much endurance to become the core ancestors who embody the Father’s tradition and bequeath it for thousands of generations to come. (363:254, December 25, 2001)
If we cannot forbear, then we cannot pay back the debt we owe to God and cannot resolve the grievances within His bosom. Because the fortune of heaven and earth moves along with God’s providence, when we remain with God, sharing His bitterness, indignation, and sorrow, then judgment can fall on the satanic world.
This is the reason Heaven teaches us to restrain our anger, be gentle and modest, and persevere in our life of faith. Satan will invade if we fall out of step with God and create a gap between God’s providence and ourselves.
Therefore, we who have faith must unconditionally sacrifice and obey, following only the internal aspects of love. (1:113, June 10, 1956)
END OF BOOK CHAPTER